LIFE IS HARD ENOUGH SO STOP COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHERS

Can you believe we’re already in the Back To School season and Fall is right around the corner?! In ‘normal’ years many of us would be excited about that but this year it seems that everything is just craziness. Now with Covid cases on the rise right, we wonder, might we get that dreaded 2nd wave? Life is hard enough already so we need to go easy on us, especially when doing a boudoir session, and stop comparing ourselves to others.

This time of year is already a busy time and now there’s so much added stress with ‘when exactly will school start, do I send my child back at all, will another wave hit, will this ever end?!’ It’s just soooo much and so exhausting.

How I Cope

I find I need time to myself to do nothing, or at least something really brainless like scroll through social media. No offence social media but y’all know what I mean. The one thing I need to stop doing however is compare myself to others when looking on social media.

Despite all that is going on in the world, I’m still seeing those posts of moms doing Pinteresty things at home with their kids, not to mention the picture perfect back to school stuff. Are you kidding me?! I barely get through the day with my son at home ALL. THE. TIME. It’s a lot. Heck, I’m not afraid to admit that I’ve sat on my kitchen floor and had a good cry. You shouldn’t be afraid to admit that either, because people, that’s REAL LIFE right now!

We’re in a pandemic! This is all new to all of us and we haven’t been taught how to cope with something like this. We’re all just doing the best we can.

In life and boudoir, stop comparing yourself to others.

Back to social media. I do like having that distraction though being able to look at pretty things, creative things and keeping up with family and friends. There’s a sense of normalcy in that.

For me, as a boudoir photographer, I like to look at images that other photographers have taken. Get inspiration and ideas for my own business. Did you know Mateus Studios is not only on Facebook and Instagram but we’re also on Pinterest and LinkedIn? I love pinning on Pinterest. It doesn’t happen very often but it’s a nice, creative and calming break for me.

In life and boudoir, stop comparing yourself to others.

But Beware

If you’re scrolling through the boudoir world (I highly recommend it) and you see a pose you absolutely love, and you want to try it out at your session, just pin it, text it to me or bring that idea with you to the studio. But, remember to not compare yourself to others, especially in boudoir! I repeat: do not compare yourself (and your body for that matter!) to others.

I talk a lot about our bodies, and self love and body neutrality, and this is just a reminder that yes, you can likely rock that pose, but, you might not look the exact same in the final image and that’s ok. You may actually look better! Or, you may have a bit more cellulite or some jiggly bits and it doesn’t matter.

Plus, each person moves, bends and has different flexibility so ultimately your pics won’t be the same as anyone else’s. This is YOUR shoot and you don’t need to compare yourself to anyone else because you are uniquely you and we wouldn’t have it any other way!

Be Kind. Stop Comparing

So. Let’s all remember this: In life in general, don’t compare yourself. In the boudoir studio and afterwards, looking at your images, don’t compare yourself. You be you. Do you and appreciate you. Sure, you can take ideas from others (damn those Pinterest moms! lol) but remember you’re living YOUR life, nobody else’s. You don’t want their photos, you want YOURS!

Michele Mateus is a Vancouver Boudoir & Portrait Photographer located in Coquitlam, BC. Hair & Makeup By Jenny Valla.

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